And first of all, to the jerk who stole my digital camera, I hope you can live with yourself knowing that half the pictures on that camera were from my daughters first birthday party. "Vengeance is mine, sayeth the Lord".
So normally I'd post some cool pictures from the Star Wars celebration here. But in case you didn't read my opening sentence above, you should go read it right now. I did however get to meet Seth Green, Breckin Meyer, and Carrie Fisher. All of whom are the same height incidentally. Carrie is SHORT. IMDB says she's 5'1". I had no idea. I was totally surprised. And when I say met, I don't mean I got her autograph by paying $25 and waiting in line, I just happened to be in the right place at the right time for all 3 of those celebrities.
Anyway, here's some realizations I had while I was there:
1. I no longer love Star Wars the same way I used to even a few years ago. I wasn't overly excited to be there, I didn't scream with joy when they unveiled the cool new news and stuff, and I definitely realized there are more important things in life than Star Wars. I mean people were genuinely upset that Yoda won the contest over Darth Vader for the new Star Wars stamp that will be available in September. I just can't imagine getting myself worked up over that kind of stuff when I have a beautiful one-year old daughter at home walking through the house saying "daddy?" while I was gone. Don't get me wrong, I still love Star Wars, but not in the way I used to. You won't find me at Toys R Us or Target going on toy hunts late at night or early in the morning anymore. I'll leave that to the people who would step over their own grandmother to get the last rare figure on the peg.
2. Which brings me to my next point. Listen carefully Ebay Star Wars seller, because I'm talking to YOU. Just because you DO step over your grandmother in order to get that exclusive or rare figure, and just because you DO know that the lightsaber packaged with the 1998 Luke was 1-inch shorter than normal, making that error figure 200 times more valuable than the normal figure, AND just because you wait in line for hours at the celebration to get 6 or 12 or 24 of the exclusive "Event Only" figure that you're going to sell for triple the price on Ebay the next day DOES NOT MAKE YOU A BUSINESSMAN. IT DOES NOT MAKE YOU AN ENTREPRENEUR. IT DOES NOT MEAN YOU HAVE A JOB. It means you are a scalper, and that you need a real job, and you need to get a life. If you're between the ages of 30 and 50, and your "job" is to wake up early and stay up late to go to toy stores to get the rare figures to sell on Ebay later, you need help and should seek immediate council. I'm so tired of you. You disgust me. You're always out of shape and wearing a Star Wars or Hot Wheels t-shirt, you can never talk about anything other than toys and prices of those toys and various other toy related topics. It's one thing to have a hobby and collect toys or coins or hot wheels or even comics, but it's a whole nother thing to trick yourself into believing that scalping people and taking advantage of those with real jobs who can't get to Toys R Us at 7am is a "job". (By the way, even when I went on toy hunts late at night and early in the morning it was never to make a profit or to sell them later. I just collected that stuff for myself)
3. Sometimes the people that you think care about you, really only care about themselves.
4. I love Los Angeles.
5. The Avalanches album from 2000, entitled "Since I left you" is probably the coolest thing I've ever listened to. I REALLY hope they are still together and put out another album sometime. "Electricity" is a song I can listen to over and over and over again.
6. There are two parking structures at the Los Angeles Convention Center. Both look exactly the same and both have sections like "F8". This makes it almost impossible after walking around for 10 hours for you to remember which structure you actually parked in. Thank God for Filipino security guards driving around in golf carts. This dude took me RIGHT TO my car. I didn't even tell him where I thought I had parked, or what my car was near. I just told him I couldn't figure out where my car was and that I was SURE this is where I parked it. He then told me to hop on and drove out of the one parking structure, across the street to the next one, and RIGHT TO my car. I told him he was an angel.
7. Finally, I realized there's nothing better than enjoying the things in life that you truly love, with someone at your side that truly loves you.....
I wish I hadn't gone alone, it would have been special to share it with my wife. It's not that I didn't invite her, and at one point she was actually coming. But family stuff happened, and at the last minute she couldn't make it. I thought I'd be just as happy alone as I would have been if she was there anyway. But I was wrong.
To admit that for the next 5 days I'll be at the big ol' Star Wars convention in Los Angeles. It's going to be super duper fun. I plan on purchasing a few toys, nerding out with fellow Star Wars fans, and absorbing as much Star Wars goodness as humanly possible. The last 3 "Star Wars Celebration" events have been in Denver and Indianapolis. So it's nice that this one will be in Los Angeles, AKA driving distance. But with gas prices as much as they are right now, I should have just flown. Oh well.
I need to be a better Christian. "Complete surrender" was the phrase that stuck with me tonight. Haven't done it. Don't know if I ever have. I wonder what's in store for me if I do. But I can't just do it because I think God will bless me, right? That's like washing your moms car not because she is in a wheelchair and can't, but because you know she'll give you 5 bucks. I feel like it's wrong. I need to have my heart changed. I'm not a very good Christian. Husband. Father. Friend. Brother. Son. Employee. It's been that way a long time. Thing is, everyone has their testimony of how they were before they were a Christian. But I've been a Christian since I was about 8. I don't remember what I was like before I was a Christian. I just know I've had struggles during my Christianity. And since I'm intelligent and consider myself someone who understands life, I feel like I should be better than this. Don't get me wrong. God isn't making me feel guilty. And being a Christian doesn't mean you feel like shit about yourself all the time. I'm just 29 and really thought I'd be in a different place than I am now. Yeah I know I have a great wife and a beautiful daughter and one on the way and I'm blessed beyond my expectations, but what have I done with my life? How does someone completely surrender? I don't even think I know how. I've been on my knees. I've cried. I've repented. I've read my bible. I've served my fellow man. I've given of my time, energy, and money. Maybe something is wrong with me, because I feel like I'm a huge disappointment at this stage in my life.
Having said all that, I refuse to believe the lie that indulging in "self" and forsaking God is the way to go. I'd rather walk this hard road and end up in heaven, then turn my back on God, live it up here on Earth, and spend my life in hell. You hear that Satan? Fuck off. Your days are numbered, and I am going to ask God for a front row ticket to watch him destroy you. And after God has defeated you and you're lying there bloody, beaten, battered, and broken, I'm going to spit on you.
By the way God, if you read my blog I could REALLY use one of those dreams like in the Old Testament where you send an angel to someone while they sleep, and they explain exactly what you want them to do and how to get there. I haven't done so well in my 29 years trying to figure it out myself. Just look at the trail of brokenness behind me.
Hey everyone. I did a new podcast. It's been two months since my last podcast, but this one is well worth the wait. The 3 new songs I've chosen are going to make you wish you had a spider monkey as a pet. Click on "051207podcast" in the small white window to the left. Have a great Mother's Day all you mother's out there.
No more Mother's or Father's Day. I have alternatives.
Mother's day, Father's day, and similar holidays really annoy me. It's pretty much a given that mothers and fathers get treated nice all year, so it's kind of ridiculous that we have to specify an entire day for it.
Why don't we just abolish those days and come up with a better day? Like for example "Homeless People Day". They get treated like shit all year, so it would make sense to give them a day where everyone does something above and beyond for them. Or how about "Sanitation Worker Day"? Or "Crazy ol' Grandma who has Alzheimers" day? Those days would actually make sense to me. But not Mother's day, or Father's day, or Flag day, or any other ridiculous day.
This is by far the most accurate and incredible "personality profile test" I've ever taken. And I put those words in quotes, because all you have to do is click on the pictures. It's incredible. Do it!
Going to rip what little hair I do have left on my head, out. I hate so much of my job. Excuse me while I vomit.
In other news, the new Linkin Park album, "Minutes to Midnight", deserves a word far worse than "sucks". They've went from hardcore rap-metal, to sounding like the next incarnation of the Backstreet Boys or NSync. They have two "rock" style songs on the album, and they aren't anything special. The rest of the album is full of slow ballad-type songs, that sound like they were made by any one of the current bands that all the teenage girls scream for these days.
I was really looking forward to this album. What a disappointment. I've been looking at forums and even Linkin Park's website and myspace page. I am the majority. People across the board hate this album. I've NEVER understood why bands feel the need to "reinvent themselves" as the lead singer from Linkin Park put it. They got where they are because of their unique sound. I always think to myself that if an established bands 3rd or 4th album was their first album instead of 3rd or 4th album, would people like that band? I would have to say absolutely not, with Linkin Park's new album.
www.gottgame.com, there is a poll on the bottom right of the screen. One of the other show hosts (who also happens to run the website) just emailed me and told me he is winning by a landslide, so please go vote for me RIGHT NOW!