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Thursday, May 29, 2008
The Church Nicki and I go to meets at a high school.

As we were walking into the service, I found one of those cool triangle folded notes from one person to another. I never knew how to fold a page like that, so I was depressed when I saw it, and felt like I was in high school all over again. So here's what the note said. I'm leaving all grammatical and spelling errors intact:


OMG! School is almost over. WTF! YESS! Wow I'm bore in AP Euro and I felt like writing you a note because I miss you and I love you! haha So we haven't hung out in a while and it makes me sad ALL DAY! haha So were hanging out this weekend! FA SHO! haha Wow - were going to make more videos and dance like no other! Haha Wow I'm writing so sloppy right now! haha Sorry. WOW Rohanna is writing a WHOLE page in my yearbook WTF! Haha What are you doing tonight? Were hanging out if I don't have work. :) haha I just remember our ugly scrapbook page we made Julies friend. Haha EWE! Wow 3 day weekend, then 3 days of school! Omg - what's the plan for the last day of school....we need to make some w/all the girls. :) hmmm ok so what else to write? Soooooooo

I (heart) YOU!

(heart) Jessica

posted by Ricky @ 3:15 PM   2 comments
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
Misleading headline of the week:
Football Ticket Prices up Sharply

When I read that at first, I thought it was talking about AMERICAN football. Thank GOD they're talking about the European version of football, otherwise known as SOCCER to the rest of the world. Not that I even have to pay for FOOTBALL tickets anyway, but it seemed logical for the price of NFL tickets to go up, since it basically costs me my first born child to pump a full-tank of gas now, buy groceries or purchase other goods that were a lot cheaper just months ago. I can't even believe that I'm thinking $3 for a gallon of gas is a bargain right now. Ridiculous.

But at least I don't live in Europe where it's $9 a gallon right now!!
Click here to read the article.
posted by Ricky @ 9:41 AM   0 comments
Friday, May 16, 2008
100 degrees and holding. This is going to be a random update post. I need to let my readers know what's going on. So here goes.

1. Kayla is turning two this weekend. We're having a Sesame Street party and buying her a "big girl bed". Not that she's a big girl (2 years old and STILL 21 pounds), but we need to put Brielle into the crib now, so that mean Kayla is Movin on up! To the East Side! To a dee-lux apartment in the sky! Also, we only invited parents and grandparents, so if you're a friend of mine reading this right now, please know that you should not be hurt about not getting an invite. Kayla's first birthday party was so huge, that we decided to make this one much much smaller.

2. My good friend and almost first kiss in 8th grade if I would have turned my head slightly to the left at the bus stop, instead of going straight in, resulting in the bumping of our noses, Natali Del Conte called me this morning. It was totally random, and very inspiring and sweet. She works for CBS in New York, and has her own show called Loaded. But she called me to tell me how talented I am, and to give me a few pointers to help get my little entertainment career going. Like I said, the call was very unexpected and very sweet of her. I'm going to take her advice and get a few things going next week. Also, in 8th grade Natali's dad and my dad were the "parent" chaperone's on the 8th grade ski trip. They both went out the Friday night we got there, got drunk, and came back to the cabin and made us all shut up because they were hammered.

3. The potential big news I had reported on this website a week ago is not going to happen. That's why I said potential, people. Because it wasn't concrete.

4. I really love Lincoln, CA. We've met some grrrrrrrrrreat people here already, and not only that, I just like the town.

5. My grandmothers 70th birthday is Sunday. It's a surprise party. It will be the first time in about 15 years that every single one of her children and grandchildren and great grandchildren will be in the same building. She literally might die of a heart attack the second we all walk into church to surprise her on Sunday, so I'm bringing an EMT with me.

6. I had quite a few people email and text me saying "how come I wasn't mentioned on your coma wake up post"? And to that I say, I'm sorry. I WAS SICK WHEN I WROTE IT. But seriously, don't be offended. I'll fix it someday.

7. All dogs go to Heaven.

posted by Ricky @ 3:51 PM   0 comments
Sunday, May 11, 2008
Since I feel like death warmed over...

Hi. I'm on about 5 hours of sleep, and I feel worse than I did yesterday. I just spent the last hour and a half trying to fall asleep to no avail. One of the things I started thinking about when I was in that still quiet place (because really, right now I feel like I'm dying), was what I'd like all of my friends and family to do if I'm ever in a coma. The following list is a sure fire way to get me out of it. So, here goes.

Nicki: Rub the inside of my forearm with your fingernails lightly. Also, scratch the back of my neck with your fingernails. You may also hold my hand. You can also place Brielle on my chest. You may also lie to me and tell me you're pregnant.

My brother Steve: Be a dick to me, and start yelling at me for stuff that isn't my fault, and blame me for things I had no involvement in. You may also tell me about your high school glory days when you subbed at running back for Mike Ward.

My brother Danny: Call me Rick. And cry.

My sister Amy: Call me Rijub. Also, give me a 30 second massage on my back. You may also tell me which NFL player currently likes you.

My sister Cydney: Place a cell phone next to me and put it on speaker phone. Call me, have someone answer it, and then say "Doin Ricky?"

Kayla: Say "Daddy. I. Luf. You." Then put your little hand in mine. Doo doo. Doo doo. Doo doo.

Mom: Read me a story from the Bible and substitute my name for whoever the story is about. Unless you're telling me the story of Cain and Abel. I don't want to be either one of them.

Dad: Come to my bedside and say "Hey Rich-aaaard. Get up. You have to transfer the clothes from the washer to the dryer. I also bought you a new car. So get up son."

Mike: Say "A doo, whassupwitdisgayme??? Then tell me why my taste in music sucks. You may also tell me a cool inside story about what's currently happening at Lucasarts. And you can follow all of that up with a "Rick. Get up."

Dan: Do our super annoying laugh, and then smoothly transition that into a "So ummmm, second base?" You may also say "Rick. Get up."

Justin: Tell me why you'll only ever play XBOX 360, and try to convince me to play a stupid quest game with you.

Grandma and Grandpa V: Call me "Ricky Ricky." And then Grandma you slip a $20 into my hand and tell me to get something nice for Nicki.

Grandma Joy: Call me dear, then tell me a story about our family. Make sure you laugh.

Dana: Tell me what's going on with your family. Specifically Patty and Aunt Pearl. You may also place my phone beside me, put it on the non-silent mode, then text me. That sound should wake something up inside of me.

Matt and Stacey: Tease me about my wardrobe. Definitely throw in a "nice jacket".

Kelly: Sing the midol song. And you need to look at a photo of one of my old Christmas Block Arrangements and laugh in that laugh you do.

Pastor Paul: Come to my bedside and say "Heeeey Bro. Well, looks like you're in a little bit of a mess. But don't worry, we're all praying for you."

Grant: Come tell me I'm a loser, then follow that up with how sad it is that my salary is equivalent to what a person working at Hot Dog on a Stick makes.

Marshall: Do your Borat impersonation and tell me I'm a jew, then change your mind and call me a gypsy.

Ok, now here are some things that anyone can do:
Play either "Smack My Bitch Up" or "Firestarter" from Prodigy. Loud.

Play any Star Wars movie. Make sure you start it from the beginning so I can hear the opening fanfare.

Turn on a 49er game or an A's game, depending on what season it is.

Someone can bring in a Whopper and a Chicken Sandwich from Burger King and place it under my nose.

Someone can put an XBOX 360 Controller into my hands. Or a PS3 controller. Or a Wii controller.

Someone can put an MP3 player into my ears and play the newest "A State of Trance" from Armin Van Buuren. Amy should be able to find it.

And finally, someone can cook something in my hospital room, ensuring that I smell like that food. Since I HATE smelling like food, I'm sure I'll get out of the coma by sheer annoyance.

posted by Ricky @ 1:45 PM   3 comments
It's 3:17 am right now.

And I'm furious. Because I cannot fall asleep. Nicki and Kayla were sick last week, and now it seems that I have it. It's a head cold, along with a sore throat, and it also drains you of all energy. So why am I still up at 3:17 you ask? Because my nose has been running all day, no matter what I try and do to stop it. Cold medicine. Fail. Afrin. Fail. Sudafed. Fail. Lying motionless on the couch. Fail. Nothing has worked. And since I've been wiping my nose every 30 seconds, which by the way has stayed on the right side of my nose only, my right nostril is all raw, and it stings like a blister. Not only that, but I must have been flexing my mouth muscles all day when I was blowing my nose and what not, because that's where most of the pain is happening right now. It feels like someone is pressing their fists into both sides of my jaw.

This totally sucks. I can't fall asleep. No matter how hard I try. I am NOT having a good mothers day.
posted by Ricky @ 3:17 AM   0 comments
Tuesday, May 06, 2008
I had the coolest dream in the world last night. IN. THE. WORLD.
Meaning, no one else on Earth had a cooler dream than me.

Everyone who knows me knows that my favorite band is The Prodigy. And if you didn't, now you do. The lead singer of the band is that man, Keith Flint. Best guy ever. Seriously. Anyway, here's a rundown of my dream last night... I was covering The Prodigy for some sort of news outlet. Maybe it was print, maybe it was television. Who knows. Who cares. All I do know, is that I was assigned to cover The Prodigy, and specifically, Keith Flint. My entire dream was Keith and I hanging out. In Europe. Because that's where The Prodigy is from. Keith and I went on a long above ground subway ride, and I interviewed him the whole time. Then we stopped at a pub where he bought me a beer, and our conversation continued. After that, he took me to meet the rest of the band, so I could interview them. It was extremely realistic. I mean you know those dreams that you SWEAR feel real? Well this was one of them. It also felt like I was dreaming this dream for hours and hours. There's a lot more hazy details to the dream, but I'm having a hard time recollecting them all right now. I just know that when I woke up I was extremely disappointed, and actually kind of surprised that it wasn't real.

The end.

posted by Ricky @ 9:03 AM   1 comments
Thursday, May 01, 2008
I have big news potentially on the horizon.
posted by Ricky @ 2:52 PM   1 comments
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About Me: Why yes, yes I am Ricky Borba.
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